Week 1 at Home

TGIF.... typing that never felt so good and yet so meaningless. After what is only to be assumed to be week 1, of many, working from home and having the baby at home, I made it.  It was not an easy week. I know everyone is going through this time at home and struggling in their own way.  I remind myself each day that, yes, this could likely be easier if A, B or C was different. But it also could be much harder if X, Y, or Z was different. So, I am trying to be mindful each day and not get too caught up. But it's hard. This is not meant to be a "woe is me" post, and I am grateful for what we have and that no one I know is sick as of now, and keeping those that are sick in my thoughts. But here is some honest talk and probably not very well written but here we go...haha.

On Monday I cried 3 times. Tuesday and Wednesday each just once and yesterday even though I had a few moments, I didn't (small victory). Today a few times, knowing that it's the weekend but really not much will change. I had a really hard day today.  There is so much unknown; the news cycle constant and scary. But most of all, being now a stay at home mom to a 10.5 month old and trying to work, and be semi-sane, is HARD. I bow down to all you stay at home moms!! I knew I wanted to go back to work after my maternity leave as much as it was sad and tough to do. I knew I needed a "part of my life back" and that I would be the best mom to Ethan by having my own time at work.  Now that he is home for the foreseeable future, I am so happy to be with him and have this "extra" time with him but also each hour is tough. He is a joy at this age, so much fun - playful, chatting, waving, discovering himself...that also means starting to act like a toddler, deciding he no longer knows how to nap, and teething! Poor guy! He also must be out of sorts having his routine at daycare completely upended.

This time also makes me sad that likely Ethan won't go back to his daycare this year. He loves it there and was doing so well with making friends/socializing, creating art, and learning. I know in the grand scheme of things it likely won't make a difference but still makes me sad.

This is also #firstworldproblems but it is highly likely that we won't be able to have Ethan's first birthday party in early May. Makes me so sad. We will do a party eventually and thinking this fall around his 1.5 birthday, but 😩 is all I can say.

Add to that not seeing friends nor family... let's just say, THANK GOODNESS FOR FACETIME!! And wine. And getting the baby gates set up....also these Dove mini ice cream bars. Buy them. It's the little things that are keeping me afloat. 😉

On Wednesday, it was 55 and sunny, so I took the baby for a 1 hour walk and it was BLISS. We avoided people, and there weren't too many out and about, so I felt OK. I can't forget the benefits of sunshine. Let's hope Mother Nature cooperates during these upcoming weeks and gives us more of those days.

I also gotta shout out the hubby, #dougdoesnthaventinstagram, who is working 12+ hours every day for tax season... it's not easy for him either in totally different ways. We are all in it. The "silver lining" right now for our family is having the tax deadline pushed back.

Not sure where I am going with this all but just wanted to vent a little and type out that this too shall pass, however long it will be. I have to keep reminding myself and as a bestie said when talking me off a ledge, ride this wave, the ups and downs.

Stay strong, stay healthy, and STAY HOME everyone!


1 comment:

  1. It has been a very different week working from home and not really living like normal not being able to go out and see people the same way. It has definitely been an adjustment and I have cried too. We can do this and hopefully see the end soon! All the best. Lisa


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